There are a few companies which produce vibration plate machines for a
variety of users. Some of these companies produce products geared for high
end gyms, athlete training and rehabilitation amongst other uses.
Regardless of the actual scientific valid uses of any fitness machine, if it
looks cool and it has a use for someone, it can be the ticket to a whole new
life in minutes a day, and that is how vibration machines became one of the
worst fitness gimmicks of 2009.
Marketed as a machine in which you simply have to stand or sit on for x
minutes a day to get results is the recipe for 2 things: 1. Making a
lot of money off people who don't know the any better and 2. Being laughed
years down the road as a worthless gimmick. For the people who bought
paint can shaker belts in the mid 1900s to lose weight, a vibration plate may be
the next step. Only time will tell.
Vibration plate machines come in many shapes and sizes. Most have a
plate which covers a motor and some sort of handlebars coming up.
Many exercises can be performed off the plate just as they can be performed
on the floor for (unproven) added benefit but exercises is not what people want
You will often see people standing, sitting, and lying motionless on these
vibration plates in which the only thing that is moving is the fat jiggling on
Althogh useful in some situations vibration machines are one of the worst
fitness gimmicks because of the marketing and the idea that vibration does
anything better than standard weight training and cardio exercises.
What also makes vibration plate machines one of the worst fitness gimmicks of
2009 is the price which ranges from expensive to astronomical.
"The First Resistance Toning System for the Neck, Chin & Face"
Even exercising small muscles which do not directly relate to exercises in the
gym deserve a mention in the worst fitness gimmicks.
The myth of spot reduction come into play as they claim the neckline slimmer
tightens skin by working the underlying muscles.
The commercial mentions nothing about weight loss to reduce overall body fat
levels seemingly sending subliminal messages to overweight people who think this
nodding gadget will get rid of their double or triple chin.
The final and most important selling point of this fitness gimmick is that it
gives results in "as little as 2 minutes a day" which is almost required to sell
any gadget related to building muscle or losing fat in 2009 and before.
Only those who inexplicitly spent the $19.99 to buy the plastic covered sprig
known as the Neckline Slimmer will be able to tell you how long it took for it
to get thrown in that box destined towards the attic or dump.
For now all you can do is watch the commercial over and over again and nod
your head to reduce your triple chin in 2 minutes a day.
You can see on the shopping channel commercial below all you need to know
about the fitness disc. They have the former pro bodybuilder and fitness
model talking about how he uses it which of course is basically saying that if
you buy one of these pieces of junk you will be fit
A rotating disc to stand on with a bar which splits in two is marketed to be
a "full body" or "total body" workout that targets the problem areas when in
fact it is nothing more than a 100% complete waste of money.
The disc simply rotates when your twist your legs which is exactly what has
been out for 20+ years. This time it has a bar in the middle which comes
off and splits in two.
You can twist to your delight as you wave your arms around like you're
missing an X chromosome.
The only thing more shocking than the utter worthlessness of the Frank Sepe
fitnss disc is the price which is a downright joke.
"The Rapid Short and Powerful Thrust of the Shake Weight Ignites
Activity in your Entire Upper Body!"
Six minutes a day is all you need to get the body of your dreams with the
Watching the commercials you will see how the women's video states they are
"designed specifically for women" and it repeats everything women want to hear
while the men's video shows basically the same exercises yet says completely
different things geared towards men.
Shake weights claim to use "Revolutionary new technology called dynamic
inertia" which is a statement that probably has Galileo turning in his grave.
Claiming to do 240 reps per minute is another asinine statement because holding
a static position is an isometric contraction which is a single repetition as
long as the joint angle is maintained.
While shake weights may not be 100% worthless everything claimed in their
marketing is complete utter nonsense to put it lightly. The videos
basically saying you will look the models in 6 minutes a day is the classic way
to sell fitness products to the ignorant man or woman sitting on the couch with
a remote control and a credit card.
As you can see the shake weights are nothing more than a weight suspended by
springs in between the 2 ends of a dumbbell which if shakes force your muscles
to hold a static contraction. The problem with the idea is regardless if
the weight is shaking or not, it is still a static contraction which only has
affects at that joint angle. You could hold the same angle without any
shake weights and contract your muscles to get the same muscle work.
Interestingly enough, while not marketed this way, the shake weights could
provide a nice tool for trainers and personal trainers who specialize in
rehabilitation as they could be used for strengthening the muscles which
strengthen joints. The Bodyblade was another product some years ago which
was marketed similar to the shake weights as a "minutes a day" gimmick but has
been used extensively in rehab situations.
Those who Can't use the Fork & Knife properly, simply go Under the Knife
While there may be commercials from plastic surgeons on your local television
there is not as much in your face direct marketing for cosmetic procedures
designed to change your body.
Pick up any pop culture magazine, watch reality TV shows, or even your local
news and stories of common as well as bizarre cosmetic procedures were on the
rise in 2009. Starting with botox and collagen for the face people then
often hear about procedures such as butt implants, to calf implants, to ab
implants (pictured) to liposuction.
The most enticing thing about surgery and implants is the benefits seem to be
instantaneous. No 12 week long workout programs and low calorie diet
required. No sweating for 2 hours a day in the gym or refraining from
eating the foods you want, you go to sleep, wake up with a new physique.
While cosmetic procedures designed to improve the way your body looks may seem
harmless and simple they rarely are.
Cosmetic surgery is just that, surgery which is very invasive and unhealthy for
your physical health.
Popular new cosmetic procedures cost astronomical amounts of money also raise
the likelihood a doctor with little or no experience in the specific surgery
and/or implant getting blinded by the earning potential and cause more harm than
good with botched surgeries.
Regardless of whether the surgery is "successful" or not, there is still an
often painful recovery process that is never as pleasant as you were told.
If the surgery turns out to be unsuccessful what's next? You guessed, more
surgery as corrective surgery is often just as profitable for plastic surgeons.